The Spirit of the Stairwell

Here are two seemingly unrelated facts for you.

Fact One Napoleon invented the shape of the classic French baguette so that soldiers could store bread in their trouser leg

Fact Two Cinemas don’t make a profit on film tickets, all their money comes from stuff you buy on the concession stands (a large popcorn’s net value is like 27p); this is why you’re not allowed to bring your own food into screens

And so it was with these two facts uppermost in my mind that today I attempted to smuggle a Nando’s Hot Chicken Wrap into the cinema by tucking it into my sock. It made me look like I had a pronounced limp and my feet now smell of peri peri but it was totally worth it.